B.O. and A.O.

It's amazing how fast the time goes by when you're not trying to get pregnant.
No longer are my months divided into Before Ovulation and After Ovulation. It's very refreshing.
Tomorrow I have my appointment with my gyno and I am prepared. I refuse to go into this blindly again. Any test that hasn't been performed will be administered. Every nook and cranny of my uterus shall be examined and analyzed by a team of the best doctors my shitty insurance can provide. I'm not kidding, I want to know everything. I can take it, nothing is worse than not knowing.
I'm not crazy about my gyno, last time I saw her was kind of embarrasing.
I had made an appointment after experiencing spotting while 7 weeks pregnant. After she had ordered an ultrasound and examined me (all the while reassuring me she saw no blood and everything looked great) she left the room while tossing a "let me go order this ultrasound" over her shoulder. I kind of assumed she'd be back. There was no "Bye, good luck!" or "Try not to worry!" or even a "Have fun waiting for your miscarriage!"
She seemed like she'd be back and I had questions about the progesterone and baby aspirin she'd prescribed. So I sat and I waited. And waited. Finally, what seemed like 20 minutes later I poked my head out the door and spotted her talking to a woman who looked like she was in her 5th trimester. I just assumed she'd forgotten all about me to focus on a woman who's pregnancy looked more successful.
I cried all the way home, for a lot of reasons. Some important, like losing my pregnancy. Some unimportant, like my gyno is busy and my pregnancy for some reason is not the center of her world.
I doubt she remembers that visit.
But tomorrow you can bet that I won't wait for a goodbye.

Comments

[laura rogers]

Yes, Yes, every nook and cranny must be explored, or else, what's the point?